For the past 6 years, I have been dreading bedtime not because I am not tired enough but just because my demons catch up with me. In my sleep, I relive those memories I want to forget, those places I don’t want to be, I meet those people I don’t want to see.
All this got worse for the past two months even my afternoon naps decided to catch up with my nights. I have not slept well in a while resulting in constant tiredness, more paranoia episodes and more frequent mood swings. Today, I woke up fed of it that I had to let my mind rumble and rant. Lately, more places have become scary, more people are joining the list of those I don’t want to see and to crown it all more mind projections I don’t want to live.
Due to all this writing or completing other daily tasks has become very difficult and I had to prioritise and I ended up letting you fam down. I had promised myself to unpack this one day but I haven’t reached my destination yet. But being able to put this down is giving me hope that I am getting better. I can again live my thoughts out loud.
I wish you all a happy last month of 2020, hopefully, this is a season finale of this shit show of a year( excuse my English). Catch you next week as we continue to think out loud together.