I will not tell you that all will be well, I mean I have no idea if it gets any better. I know as a perfectionist you have a well laid up plan of how everything should go in your life even maybe the way you should go out to stop the pain.
I know you have heard multiple times how beautiful, smart, kindhearted and loved you are, and I am not about to repeat these to you. But I want you to look straight in the mirror
Past that shield of perfection.
Past the person, you think you should be.
Past all the critics you have for yourself.
Past all the sermons you recite to yourself every night till dawn.
Past the person, you fear to become.
I know this might be a difficult pill to swallow but I will say it.
Dear atelophobe, you need to let go of that alternate reality you created.
You need to let go of that fake smile plastered on your face.
You need to learn that there are other ways to live life.
I know it is difficult but come on you know you can achieve anything you set your mind to.
But again my dear, I want you to always remember that your truth is stronger than who you think you are expected to be. You are loved and that is all you will ever need.