Did you know a good listener can make you a better artist? When thinking of today’s prompt I honestly had no idea on what to talk about. Well, as you might know by now, my life has absolutely nothing extraordinary to it. Alas, you are expecting to read something today. I remembered sharing this story with my roommate a few weeks ago, also weirdly all stories I wrote for the past 19 days happen to come out in the middle of the night when we both cannot sleep.
I do not think this event was life-changing one but it changed the view I had for myself and was a moment of introspection that now influences most of my actions and decisions.
In July 2010, I attended a church youth retreat with the theme “If You Don’t Go, Who Will?”Attempt Great Things For God.
The retreat tackled many different controversial topics the youth meets along their path and how to live according to John 4:34. It was all fun and games when I realized that more half of the topics discussed me and my cousin kept on disagreeing with the rest of the group and when it came to pardon that’s when I had my eye-opening moment. We were asked if somebody harmed a family if we would find it in us to pardon them, everyone raised their hands on the spot without flinching.
Well, as Rwandans and with our history forgiveness is a big subject of conversation and the youth, we were taught about it very young. So yes, I and my cousin were the odd ones out at that moment and about such a sensitive topic. At that moment my shy little self wanted the earth to swallow her whole because I was in no moods to explain to anyone why I think it is not that easy for me to pardon.
To our greatest surprise, the priest that was leading the retreat called us very honest. Everyone was puzzled by these words, we all looked at him wondering what was coming our way next then he went on saying that he knew this was a difficult question to answer to and that saying no is the most honest way to go about it because it is an answer that opens the floor for a more genuine apology backed up with reasons which lead to a better healing process to happen.
At that moment I had an epiphany about my behaviour and why my answers were that different from the group. I am always one of those people that will question everyone even my parents because I require real reasons to even the tiniest things. I am easy to convince and yet require a clear and concise reason to why things have to be the way you think.
Ever since that retreat I stopped beating myself and started embracing that it is okay to be called difficult to convince or even being different from everyone. This moment was not only a confidence booster but also made me a better communicator because then I was more comfortable asking for more information.